When Mother’s Day isn’t Joyous

Mother’s Day is a day that many families celebrate to honor the special mother in their life. A day set aside for the women who have chosen a life of raising a family, sacrificing bits and pieces of themselves for a child. A day when little pattering feet are heard in the early morning hours and soon sweet little voices fill the room with Happy Mother’s Day, followed by homemade cards and sometimes seven breakfast in bed.

But Mother’s Day is also a day that many families mourn. It’s the day that the woman who desperately wants to hold the mother title but life has not enabled her that precious gift. Who has tried for so long and wants nothing more than to hold a sweet baby in her arms but realizes again on Mother’s Day that she may never have that opportunity. A day when she feels empty and realizes that she may never have the chance to fill the void.

It’s the day that the young mother wakes up and just like so many days before walks to the room that now remains empty of the child she once had but has lost due to illness or tragedy. For her Mother’s Day is a day of grief. A day when old wounds break open for the millionth time and she suddenly remembers that she no longer has the title of mother. That for her, that chapter is closed.

For me, it is a day of mixed emotions. It is a happy day where I have the privilege to wear the mother title while my children send me happy thoughts and well wishes followed with thank you’s for the sacrifices I have made and the opportunities I have supplied them with in life. It is also the day that I grieve for the loss of my own mother. A day that reminds me once again that I no longer have the privilege, that many take for granted, of picking up the phone and telling my mother that I love her. Or to tell her how grateful I am for the life that she provided me with.

But for me, like so many, it is not a day full of joy. It is a day when the sadness hits in waves and takes your breath away. It’s a day when you are amazingly thankful for being able to wear the title of mother, but it is also the day when you weep in private and you feel like someone has knocked the air out of you.

Mother’s Day will fill social media with smiling kids and frazzled mothers, but just know that somewhere a woman is grieving the child she will never have.  A mother is mourning the child that was taken too soon from her arms and a child, whether young or old, is relying on the memories to suffice enough to make it through one more Mother’s Day.

So on this Mother’s  Day I ask you to take one moment out of your happy day and send a prayer of peace and comfort for the ones whose day is filled with loss and grief.